I should have done more...

These words are like knives that cut and open new wounds that never heal. Each time they are said they carve a new strand of guilt that separates us from the reality we deal with. In the process of life we make choices that feel are right, but what about in the face of death. Loved one is dying, should I go home and sleep? What if they are not here in the morning, should I have left? If i would have left 5 minutes earlier I would have made it to the hospital in time. If I would have gotten up to check on them I would have seen a change in them and they would still be here. The IF is a knife that is cutting another wound in us because we cannot accept the reality of death as a natural progression. We always think what if, what if, what if.

People are put on this earth for a reason. They make us stronger and they live to create a piece of  puzzle that will fit in our lives at some point. When we grasp on to the guilt and the what ifs, we are forgetting that we have a piece of someone that is supposed to go somewhere. Whether that piece is telling us to be a better brother, a better sister, lover, father, or mother; we should always have it with us. With the piece of them in hand we should figure out that life has a plan for all of us. Whether you were in the room, on your way, or left too early, the reality is it happened because it was supposed to.  Now we are left with figuring out the why, the what if, the maybe, the should of when we should be finding the piece and where it fits in the puzzle we are left. When our minds do not let us heal, we forget the good we did. In times of sickness and struggle, the motherly, fatherly or protective instincts are in overdrive and to a child that is LOVE. To a Grandfather or Grandmother, that is LOVE. Let love guide yo and know, that in that very time of sickness and struggle...They had the best life has to offer.